Home » Food and Drink » Oh, Velveeta, Why Do You Torture Me So?

Oh, Velveeta, Why Do You Torture Me So?

Today’s Daily Prompt is to tell you what I hate to love.

My mom was an earth mom. Was. Cloth diapers and canning her own veggies. And then after having 2 kids, the youngest of which (me) was kind of a handful, there was this slow progression to modern conveniences, such as Pampers and Green Giant. It was somewhat rare in our house to eat anything from a box. I actually gasped in her kitchen the other day when I found a boxed brownie mix she was using to make treats for the teachers at her school. Years ago it would have been quite the scandal.

Macaroni and cheese was almost always homemade until I was in high school. I actually prefer it that way, but for some reason mine doesn’t turn out like hers does. And my rue always leaves lumps in the cheese sauce. It wasn’t until I flew the coop to college that I discovered the ooey gooey goodness that is Velveeta. And let me tell you. Ain’t no craving like a Velveeta craving.

I have lots of cravings. Usually chicken nuggets from McDonalds. Or anything chocolate-peanut butter. But I love cheese, and I love pasta, so when a Velveeta craving hits nothing will divert me until I get me some. And THEN, I usually eat most of… if not the entire… box. It’s bad. I can’t even explain what happens. It’s like some kind black hole for cravings. Totally unhealthy. Although I’ve never had a craving for carrots, so I’m not sure a healthy craving exists.

And then the guilt sets in. I get really sleepy. My stomach hurts. And the extra pound or two shows up on the scale the next day. And no matter how good the Velveeta tastes, it has become the one thing in this world that I absolutely hate to love.

About these ads

6 thoughts on “Oh, Velveeta, Why Do You Torture Me So?

  1. Pingback: CHASING FRIENDSHIPS « hastywords

  2. Pingback: Daily Prompt: Guilty Pleasures I Hate To Love | My Blog

  3. Your title really drew me in…it reminds me of a alley cat I “rescued” many years ago. I was in college and lived with far too many people and pets crammed into a ramshackle building. The weekly get-together was Thursday taco night, my contribution was Velveeta Mexican. The kind with the spicy peppers…they packaged it by the pound. I put the block of Velveeta on my counter while we all socialized. When it was time to eat, there was nothing left of that Mexican Velveeta but a tattered box and foil wrapper. My cat was foolish enough to eat the entire pound of spicy cheese-flavored food product. But at least smart enough to later break into a neighbor’s place to use their cat’s litterbox instead of his own. What a hellacious, pepper-specked mess.
    Ahh, memories.
    Merry Christmas from Maryland,
    Melanie

    • Oh my goodness! Luckily my dog hasn’t ever gotten hold of anything like that. I made cheese dip this past weekend from a block of Velveeta. It’s such a weird texture before it melts. I’m quite certain I could bounce cubes of Velveeta off the kitchen floor.

  4. Pingback: Velveeta Is Almost Cheez « Ribbie's Weblog

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s